By Abraham Kuch Luiny
I can imagine that in my culture when the firstborn brother dies, the second born brother must marry for him a wife; if not, the spirit of the dead brother will kill the children of the surviving brother. In case he marries himself a wife, it’s a tradition in South Sudan that every Dinka must practice because of the consequences.
Not only that, but also when your maternal uncle dies (the brother to your mom), and he doesn’t have any other brother, it’s a responsibility for the children of the sister, whether first born or second born, to marry for him; if not, the same consequences have to overtake and affect the family.
It’s also a tradition of the Dinkas that when your father gets old and he wants to marry, he can marry, but when he becomes weak and the wife is still young, he will call one of his sons to take over his wife and produce children for him. Or he can decide that sometimes when he feels like marrying at his old age, he will just marry and call one of his sons to take over the wife to produce children for the father. If I tell you that this practice is still taking place today, you won’t believe it.
But is it a good idea to marry your father’s wife? Is it a good idea to marry for the dead? What are the biblical views on this situation? Can it take us to the next level?
The Biblical view, though not accepted,
The dead are dead. There’s no connection between the dead and the living, as said Solomon, “Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might, for there’s neither work nor device, Nor knowledge, nor wisdom in the grave, whither thou goest. (Ecclesiastes 9:10). It’s so clear that, when you die, You can marry in the grave; all memories are not there, and the dead person knows nothing about what the living are doing, even though when you die, they’ll not know whether
You’ve died; they’ll not know whether you’ve gotten married or not; there’s no celebration, and they don’t even talk to the living.
In fact, a man is made from the soil; when he dies, the soil goes back to the soil, and the breath that was breathed into you by God goes back to God who gave it (Ecclesiastes 12:8). Therefore, no one should tell you that the spirit of my dead brother will kill my children if I don’t marry for him. If you don’t want your brother’s name to be lost, just do the right thing. Therefore, believe what I’m saying.
In the ancient days, if your brother had died and you loved him, you wanted his name to remain. You’d marry only one wife, But the condition was that the firstborn children would be his if he was a boy; if not, you waited for the boy, and the rest of the children would be yours if he was alive. The Bible also commented that “The nakedness of thy father’s wife shalt thou not uncover; it’s thy father’s nakedness “. It’s very clear that your father’s wife is your mother, and the children he produces are your blood brothers and sisters. If I may ask, how will you call your father’s wife, who had sex with you?
Your husband or mother how will you call the children that you’ve produced? Your brothers and sisters, or your children?
We’re in the world of computerization; I mean, we’re in the world of civilization. Even apart from civilization, nature itself can challenge our traditions and cultures. To have sex with your father’s wife is an abomination. I think there are some traditions and cultures that we have to let go of, despite the consequences that we think of. The consequences are just our beliefs that fulfill themselves, because what I know so far is that belief can make things happen even though they’re not supposed to take place; hence, what we believe is what we can archive in life. If we believe we will die, we will surely die because we believe it, but if we don’t believe that I can die, we’ll not surely die until the time is designed for us to go. It’s only our beliefs that make us regret and can make us happy in our lives.
Imagine, assuming you’ve got two brothers who died, that the traditions and cultures demand that you marry for them, and you yourself want to marry, but you don’t have enough wealth to get married for all of them and yourself. How will you survive it? It’s a complete burden and may cause some dangerous things in the life of that person, such as involvement in crimes, taking of alcohol, and so many other mental and health issues. Because your brother’s spirit will be crying to you to marry for them and you yourself, but you don’t have enough wealth to marry for them, it’s a burden and it’s against humanity. It’s slavery; the devil just wants to take advantage of some of us. Hence, let’s work for the Forward instead of the backward.
The writer can be reached via email at abrahamkuchluiny34@gemail.com or WhatsApp number
0927318410