Ustaz Mark Bang
A father usually told his children when they were younger that: “When you all reach the age of 12, I will tell you the secret of life.”
One day, when the oldest turned 12, he anxiously and curiously asked his father what the secret of life was. The father replied that he was going to tell him, but he should not reveal it to his brothers. “The secret of life is this: The cow does not give milk.” “What are you saying?” I asked the boy incredulously. As you heard it, dear son: The cow does not give milk; you have to milk it. You have to get up at 4 am in the morning, go to the field, walk through the kraal full of manure, tie the tail, hobble the legs of the cow, sit on the stool, place the bucket, and do the work yourself.” One can only imagine the look on the child’s face. That is the secret of life; the cow does not give milk. You milk her or you don’t get milk. This generation thinks that cows ‘GIVE MILK’, that things are automatic and free; their mentality is if “I wish, I ask, I dream, browse… I obtain.” They have been accustomed to getting whatever they want the easy way… But no, life is not a matter of wishing, asking, dreaming, obtaining, and typing AMEN to receive free money without working on false prophets’ pages. The things that one receives are the effort of what one does. We have to take steps towards achieving our goals.
Happiness is the result of effort. Lack of effort creates frustration. An idle mind is the devil’s workshop; God rewards efforts. 1 Kings 17:10: The widow of Zarephath was so desperate but met Elijah as she collected firewood. Even if, after putting in the effort, you received nothing, take solace in the fact that you left no stone unturned. Besides, no experience should ever be wasted. So, share with your children from a young age the secret of life, so they don’t grow up with the mentality that the government, their parents, or their cute little faces are going to give them everything they need in life. This is why the majority are suffering now.
Remember: “Cows don’t give milk; they need to work it out for themselves.” Let’s teach our children the truth. Hard work is required for success in life. It’s very important in our lives to work hard in order to be somebody in the future. I want to become a hard worker. How do I go from lazy habits to hard work? Procrastination must be one of the easiest arts to master, and one most of us are pretty damn good at. Since I sat down to write this, I have stopped for two cups of coffee, made some toast, read some emails, been on Facebook, and, so far, only written a couple of sentences. Our lives are littered with indecision, missed deadlines, unfinished bathrooms, unused gym memberships, unwritten novels, unfulfilled promises to friends, visits we have never made, shelves we have never put up—the list is endless. Procrastination saps our energy, wastes our time, costs us money, holds us back, makes liars of us, and stops us from being healthy, wealthy, happy, and fulfilled. It is a slow subconscious killer of dreams. I read an all too familiar story in a magazine the other day; it went: “When we first got married, my wife brought home a whiteboard on which we could list the jobs that needed to be done. About a year later, it disappeared. Just before our silver wedding anniversary, I found the whiteboard in our garage. There were about 20 jobs on it. None of them had been done, and most of them still needed to be done.” Another story went:
“I am a teacher, and I once left a set of books unmarked for so long I was embarrassed to give them back to the students yet again unmarked. So I hid them, then went into the classroom and told them they had been stolen.” Procrastination comes in many clever guises; it has fooled me many times. It can trick you into thinking you’re productive when in fact you are avoiding doing something difficult or that you don’t want to do. We go to bed at the end of the day, telling ourselves that tomorrow will be different; tomorrow we will make a start, for sure. The stage is set, and then we come up with excuses for why we have not started. Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.
We often describe procrastination as the fear of starting something! Putting it off until tomorrow. Maybe subconsciously we are telling ourselves, ‘if you don’t start, you can’t fail.’ The trouble is, you will never succeed either. But procrastination is not always about failing to start something; it’s often about starting the wrong thing and taking the short-term pleasures over the long-term reward. Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn’t the work he’s supposed to be doing at that moment. We could rely on willpower, but as we all know, willpower is likely to let us down. Nothing in the world can take the place of perseverance. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost legendary. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Perseverance and determination alone are omnipotent.
Much of the stress that we feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not finishing what we start. So what can we do about it? Don’t try to come up with all the reasons why you can or cannot start. Just start. He who awaits much can expect little. Don’t set yourself unrealistic deadlines (goals).
Choose three stones in 3 months: write your first novel and get it published in 2 months; learn a language in 1 month; if you do, you know you’re going to fail. Deadlines on their own are nothing more than hurdles to fall at if you don’t also have a clear ‘do-able’ plan to meet them. Hang on, is that not procrastination again? In reality, if it’s something you dread doing, then perhaps it’s something you shouldn’t do. Procrastination is harder than ever to avoid in this age of social media, mobile devices, constant text messaging, and computer games.
Remove all those distractions for the time you have set aside to begin your task. It sounds obvious, but most of us don’t do it. Try Merlin Mann’s idea to trick yourself into progress: Work for ten minutes with a single-minded focus on moving toward the completion of a single task. Ten minutes, and that’s all. So please, all we need is courage, resilience, patience, and determination. With these things, everything you want to achieve in life will happen. “Public Staunchest Ally.”
The writer of this article is a human rights activist, writer, and professional teacher.