By Ngor Khot Garang
It is now another week and it is a blessing having another day to write to you. I enjoy this time because it is a silent moment where I empty myself to children who are not so lucky enough. But you know what; I didn’t know that I would make it up to this week. The struggle was never easy and I nearly gave up. I was sweating profusely and my heart was beating as if it would burst for the fear of unknown, maybe hunger would come and slaughter me in my sleep, it could be an unknown gunman and many other things so frightful but somehow, God guided me but my biggest worry is what next week holds in store for me.
Little ones, getting through a day not even a week is always a prayer request for most of us and most times your prayer could go unanswered if you are not lucky enough. You often wonder where your next meal would come from. It is systemic fear always but the greatest of all is this fear brought about by US dollar and it has even increased the level of my heartbeat and my clothes were soaked with sweat, but tears made it worse. I pray most times for God to open a way out, but it just keeps getting worse. Doors keep shutting before me and I just watch speechless with just warm tears just rolling down through my cheeks.
But what is this US dollar you may ask. Well let me make it simple. It is a white man’s money but it has destroyed our country and its impacts on people’s lives are much heavier compared to the negative impacts of war. But who is this white man or who are these white people? There would be need to ask this question and it would be a very good question. White people are some kind of people who have made it completely in life.
They have good schools, roads, hospitals and they don’t kill themselves anyhow. They also travel to the month and there was a time they had planned to create a human being like us and this was the only decision they had failed to execute because it is God alone who can create a human being but they have invented so many things and made a lot of discoveries and their military prowess have given them all the powers to rule the world with everything including their money.
But why are they not sparing South Sudan since it is a young nation and on top of that has many problems with itself? This again little ones is a very good question but what you should know is that most of these white people are good and they have been standing with South Sudan from the liberation struggle up to this day. We have many humanitarian organizations in South Sudan and they are doing a lot in female reproductive health and many areas of life. But what is not known is the reward they will get after this. To most people, South Sudan would have been one of the richest country in African soil and the white man is fully aware of this and it could be the reason why they are giving all these necessary support to South Sudan or it could be purely humanity at work and if it Is humanity at its best, little ones, if you still get your resources later, you have to appreciate these people and worship them like your demi gods but if you find nothing, just know that you have nothing to live for again. You will only remain as poor as you came and for you to get something to eat, you would sell part of South Sudan little by little untill it is done.
But, what about this issue of dollar, who holds the blame, the white man or Southern Sudanese themselves? This is a very hard question but I know how to answer it, most of the people who have money here are foreigners. They made this money here and they don’t invest this money in South Sudan. They had to change this money into dollar and they don’t do it in the bank because the bank rate is little compared to the one in the black market and this is where problems sneak in.
Second to that is the fact that we are economically dependent nation. We don’t produce anything despite the rich soil that we have, we are still very poor and the way out is very dark. Little ones, if small and mega companies and small retail shops are being owned by foreigners and South Sudanese are still killing and accusing them for nothing, what future do you have? You are very unfortunate and for years you will have God to blame when he brought you here or unless when you decide to be different people but that won’t be easy. Here people steal and it is not this ordinary stealing, it is looting of public funds and this is the only way you become rich but who among you would never want to become rich? I think this is the same way you will go and this darkens South Sudan’s future daily. The oil rich nation is no longer for South Sudanese, it is something else and it is very sad to believe that after all the struggle we went through, the sleeplessness nights and the blood poured for the sake of this country, this is just how we ended up and the price we are forced to pay is to die without the benefits of being a South Sudanese.
This was not the way this country was made to be little ones and you need to set yourself different from us the spoiled generations. We don’t have anything good for us and those who are going to be born 10 or 20 years from now are still going to be like us or worse than us. South Sudan would still be empty for years without buildings or anything beautiful and if there is anything that every generation would be confronted with, it is grave and bones and nothing else. And get it right, the foreigners we have here are good people.
Why did I say so, they realized that South Sudan is a land of opportunities and that is why they came here to do business so that they continue developing their home countries because they know that money eaten can be buried with a person but when it is used for the development of the country, it can last for generations. Now who will build South Sudan and how long would it take? What if we lost all the resources, where will we go 70 years from now? Just look at these foreigners how hard working they are and how they are prospering out of our back the South Sudanese and we are still killing ourselves as if killing is the only best thing we could do. If we want to save the future generations, corruption must be put to an end because we don’t want them to learn how to steal public funds. Tribalism should and must not be part of their life. We must teach them that without other people around them, they are nothing and this is to say that we cannot live alone, we need each other. We need to love those people around us and this the only way we can succeed together without anybody having to cry for having been left behind. The unborn children must find good schools, roads, tall buildings built by South Sudanese, not graves and more graves for the people killed by South Sudanese.