In life, I wonder a lot when things are not working out. Most times I feel like something has gone wrong somewhere in my life. Maybe God is no longer interested in my struggle. Maybe he doesn’t want to pick and fix my broken pieces.
For others, it means something different. Maybe somebody has bewitched them. Perhaps this is why their plans are not bearing fruit. This has been the notion of one of the friends I loved so much.
She is roughly 20 or 21 but she was ahead of her time before her 18th birthday. She had a successful boutique business when life was still meaningful but now, everything is a sad story to tell. She is now penniless, and every door seems to be locked.
In this life, two struggling young people should not make friends. This is suicidal or double loss, but she has delusional eyes that see a future that does not exist. She confides in me more than anybody and I do the same.
The person who tells you his or her secrets and the one who strips himself naked in front of you share a lot in common.
This is trust. It also means that they are nothing without you. They want to tell you that you are the only family, hope, and pillar they have in life. This is the way this guy has been to me. But I have never told her about my painful journey. But she knew this from the beginning.
Of course, when you find this young girl. Something will tell you that she is the happiest person around. But invade her privacy and this is the time when you will surely know that this life is unkind. I cannot deny this; she is very strong but there are times when she would repeat the notion that somebody might have bewitched her. This is something that I don’t subscribe to. It is just that life has to be unfair sometimes.
Even in my darkest moments, though nothing has ever worked out in my life. I can and will never conclude that somebody has done something to me.
As long as there is still life, there is still a light at the end of a very long dark tunnel. If you are going through one problem or the other, first think about somebody who is dreaming of having the kind of life you have. All is still fine and when you hang in there for five or ten years, who knows what will happen? Something great maybe. And in the future, I don’t think something like that will exist. It matters what you do daily and that is the future you create.
We should be humble but there is something you should remember when nothing is working out in your life. It is not a curse; you should not think like that. Sometimes you have to lose so someone else can win.
Your misery is another person’s joy. When you attend that interview and fail to get that job, someone else is thankful you did because that increased their chances of getting it. Life works in reverse. When you lose your life in an accident, somebody else lives to inherit your home and when you have nothing like that, maybe your wife.
Your doctor is not happy that you are not falling sick.
The coffin seller is depressed when death rates decline. Gravediggers have families to feed and when death rates decline, their families will have nothing to eat. Someone’s good business implies another’s bad days. It is wisdom that the elders forgot to pass on as generations progressed.
When that girl rejects you, it helps another guy to get accepted. It is a blessing. When you commit a crime, you help two more policemen get hired and their salaries rise. You are creating jobs through crimes.
So, then you see, good cannot be unless evil exists. We can’t know life unless we have known death. You can’t know happiness unless you have known pain, suffering and rejection. I have seen all these and am still going through them, but it is not making sense.
Whatever you do not make you what you are. You can’t know health unless you have known sickness.
You can’t comprehend wealth unless you have experienced poverty.
You must lack so you can understand what it means to have. You know those African politicians; they have stolen a lot, and they are doing it because they don’t know what it means to have nothing. Without thoughtless people, the intelligence wouldn’t exist. Without those hateful relatives, you will not find love.
A man is not a man unless you have seen a woman.
For what is light but the absence of darkness? And what is darkness but the absence of light? Just as you can’t have gods without mortals. Do you know Karma? What about Buddha and Jesus? Some of these personalities had to die for others to live. That was the case with Jesus.
Buddha had to deprive himself of happiness for others to find meaning in their lives. This is the way it goes. You can’t have winners unless you have losers. Your loss implies someone else’s win. This is why you should be humble enough.
What then shall we say? Problems run this world or this country. You have them in abundance and if they were sold, you would have been another Jeff Bezos or Bill Gates around. Now you are on your knees, praying to a God who brought these problems.
I am sorry but those problems will never go. You are and will be somebody because of those problems. And let me tell you the day problems cease to exist will mark the end of human life. We as humans have got to the top because we solved more problems than other species. We are here to solve problems, we are here to create some, and we are here to activate others.
For you can’t know friendship unless you’ve experienced enmity. You can’t appreciate love unless you’ve felt hatred. Whatever disempowers you, empowers someone else. Without the weak, the strong wouldn’t exist. We are what we are because of what someone is not. Someone’s business mistake, someone’s ignorance is our profit.
Life then is a joy to experience.
Long days but short years. Every day we have a chance to offer our lives so the next generation can exist. We are humans. Problems we solve, Problems we create. And because of problems, we progress.
It will be fine some days. In Greek Mythology, there was a man named Sisyphus. He was punished by pushing a stone up a mountain for the rest of his life. Whenever the stone got to the top, it would roll back down, and Sisyphus would have to go down and begin the same process afresh.
This was a painful punishment, and we are like this guy. The goal is not to push that stone up the mountain and it remains there; it is to find meaning in those difficult moments. It is to fall in love with the process. It is also to find something heavier than ourselves, something worth pushing.